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  • Writer's pictureMichelle Henderson

Transforming Betrayal into Empowerment: Dr. Debi Silber


Transforming Betrayal
Empowerment

In the realm of psychology and personal development, few stories are as compelling as that of Dr. Debi Silber. Renowned as a holistic psychologist, health mindset speaker, and bestselling author, Dr. Silber's work revolves around a unique and transformative concept: healing from post-betrayal syndrome.

 

Imagine grappling with the shattering experience of betrayal, not once but twice - first from family and then from a spouse. This was the reality Dr. Debi Silber faced. However, instead of succumbing to despair, she embarked on a journey of self-discovery and empowerment that would ultimately reshape her life and the lives of countless others.

 

Dr. Silber's initial foray into psychology and personal development centered around traditional methods of healing and personal growth. However, it was her own painful experiences of betrayal that compelled her to delve deeper into the intricacies of this unique form of trauma.

 

Through her groundbreaking research and personal journey, Dr. Silber uncovered three pivotal discoveries that would redefine her understanding of betrayal and its impact:

 

1. Betrayal is a Different Type of Trauma: Unlike other forms of trauma, betrayal feels intentional and deeply personal, affecting every aspect of one's being - from self-worth to trust and belonging.

 

2. Post Betrayal Syndrome: Dr. Silber identified a collection of physical, mental, and emotional symptoms common to those who have experienced betrayal, now recognized as post-betrayal syndrome.

 

3. Five Stages of Healing: Perhaps the most significant revelation was the discovery of five predictable stages individuals go through in order to heal from betrayal. From shock and trauma to finding a new normal and ultimately experiencing rebirth and a new worldview, these stages provide a roadmap for transformation.

 

Armed with these insights, Dr. Silber founded the Post Betrayal Transformation Institute and developed specialized programs aimed at guiding individuals through their healing journey. From her bestselling books like "Trust Again" to her comprehensive coaching programs, Dr. Silber's work offers a beacon of hope for those navigating the complex terrain of betrayal.

 

Central to Dr. Silber's approach is the recognition that healing from betrayal is not a linear process. It requires courage, introspection, and a willingness to confront deep-seated emotions. By embracing the five stages of healing and committing to self-discovery, individuals can emerge from betrayal not just healed, but transformed.

 

Dr. Debi Silber's story is a testament to the power of resilience and the human capacity for growth. Through her tireless advocacy and compassionate guidance, she continues to inspire individuals worldwide to reclaim their power and rewrite their stories of betrayal into tales of triumph.

 

To embark on your own journey of transformation and discover more about Dr. Debi Silber's work, visit the Post Betrayal Transformation Institute at [pbtinstitute.com](https://pbtinstitute.com/).

 

In the words of Dr. Silber herself, "Transformation."




 Transcript of Episode:


Michelle Henderson :

In this episode, we are joined by the incredible Dr. Debbie Ser, a Listic psychologist, health mindset speaker and bestselling author Dr. Silber specializes in the helping individuals heal from post betrayal syndrome, a real and impactful experience that affects health and relationships work and life. Whether you're grappling with a painful betrayal or feeling stuck in your current situation, Dr. S Silver's insights are a game changer. As the founder of the Post Betrayal Transformation Institute and a globally ranked podcast host, she shares groundbreaking discoveries on healing from betrayal. So let's get ready for the inspiring journey of transformation and empowerment. So I am going to bring her on. I am so excited to hear about her story. Hello. Hello.


Dr. Debi Silber:

Hi there. Looking forward to our conversation.


Michelle Henderson :

I am as well. So I was really excited. I was doing some research on you, Debbie, and I thought, oh my gosh, this lady is incredible because your program is so different than other programs that are out there. And I know a lot of my listeners have been through a betrayal trauma situation. So what I want to hear from you first is what inspired you? What is your inspiration story behind all of this program?


Dr. Debi Silber:

Yeah, well, I don't think anybody ever says, I think I want to study betrayal. No, you study it because you have to. I'm in business over 30 years. It was health mindset, personal development, and then I had a really painful betrayal from my family. I thought I did everything I needed to heal from that. And it happened a few years later. This time it was my husband, that was the deal breaker. Anybody who's been through it, it's so shattering your heartbroken. And so got him out of the house and looked at the two experiences thinking, what's similar to these two? Of course, me, but what else? And I realized I never took my own needs. Seriously. Boundaries were always getting crossed and decided that if nothing changes, nothing changes. So here he was, four kids, six dogs, a thriving business, and I decided to enroll in a PhD program.

I don't know what it was about it, but a book wasn't getting me out of this jam. I needed a whole PhD in it. And then it was time to do a study. So I studied betrayal, what holds us back, what helps us heal, and what happens to us physically, mentally, and emotionally when the people closest to us lie, cheat and deceive. And honestly, Michelle, I was just trying to heal from my betrayal. I had no idea what was going to happen besides that, but that study led to three groundbreaking discoveries, which changed my health, family, my work, my life.


Michelle Henderson :

Wow, that is incredible. So what would you tell somebody that doesn't? Because you were able to get your foot going in the ground and start moving. So what if somebody has been betrayed and they don't know where to go or how to get that foot moving and start moving and getting their life adjusted to where they need to be?


Dr. Debi Silber:

Yeah, that's why I love sharing about the discoveries because anybody who hears about them will understand why they're having a hard time putting that first step in the ground to start moving forward. And I get it. I totally understand it. It really has to do with the symptoms that we experience when we've been betrayed. It has to do with the fact that betrayal is a very different type of trauma, and it also has to do with the fact that there are these stages that will go through in order to fully heal. So I'm happy to share all of the discoveries so everyone will know exactly what they need to do. Would that help?


Michelle Henderson :

Oh, absolutely. Yes, please.


Dr. Debi Silber:

Yeah. So the first discovery was that betrayal is a different type of trauma. I had been through death of a loved one. I'd been through disease, and I was like, betrayal feels different. I didn't want to assume it was the same for all my study participants. So I asked them, if you've been through other traumas besides betrayal, does it feel different for you? And unanimously they said, oh my gosh, it's so different. And here's why. Because it feels so intentional. We take it so personally. So the entire self gets shattered. Rejection, abandonment, belonging, confidence, worthiness, trust. Think about it, if you lose someone you love, you grieve, you're sad, you mourn, the lost life will never be the same. You don't necessarily question the whole relationship. You don't question where were you when this was going on? You don't question your ability to trust. You don't question your sanity with betrayal, you do. So that type of healing and that betrayal is a different experience. That type of healing is very different. So I gave it its own name, which is now called Post Betrayal Transformation, the complete and total rebuild of your life, which you do with all traumas. That's the invitation and rebuilding the self after betrayal. That was the first discovery. So if you're wondering, why am I handling this so differently? It's because it's a different type of trauma. You want me to go into the second one?


Michelle Henderson :

Oh, absolutely. Yeah. You just keep going. I know there's what, four different stages or four different areas?


Dr. Debi Silber:

Five stages, but I'll for the Second. Okay. So the second discovery was that there's actually a collection of symptoms, physical, mental, and emotional. So common to betrayal. It's now known as post betrayal syndrome. And we've had over 95,000 plus people take our post betrayal syndrome quiz on our site to see to what extent they're struggling. And a few things about that. We've all been taught time heals all wounds, right? I have the proof that when it comes to betrayal, that's not true. There's a question on the quiz that says, is there anything else you'd like to share? And people write things like, my betrayal happened 35 years ago. I'm unwilling to trust my betrayal happened 15 years ago. Feels like it happened yesterday. So we know you cannot count on time. You can't even count on a new relationship to heal betrayal unless and until you intentionally and deliberately heal it, it will follow you around in every relationship, in your health, in your work, in everything that you do. And every couple of months, I pull the stats from the quiz to see where people land. I'm happy to share some if you want to hear it,


Michelle Henderson :

Because like you said, I think it's so important because I think a lot of people think that they're ready to move forward when they're not. You know what I'm saying? That it's a history. They think they're over it and they get triggered again and it comes back. So absolutely, please share with us,


Dr. Debi Silber:

And I would love to if we have time share, how do you know if you're not healed? That's one of the standard ways. It's like people say, well, I'm really good as long as I don't see them, that's not healed. Or if it keeps coming up again, I mean, there are classic ways and I will be happy to share. So, okay, so now imagine 95,000 people, men, women, just about every country is represented and listen to these numbers. Okay? 78% constantly revisit their experience. 81% feel a loss of personal power. 80% are hypervigilant. 94% deal with painful triggers. If you've ever had a trigger, it's debilitating. The most common physical symptoms, 71% have low energy, 68% have sleep issues, 63% have extreme fatigue. So you wake up, you're exhausted, you sleep a whole night, your adrenals have absolutely tanked. 47% have weight changes. So maybe in the beginning you can hold food down later on, you're emotionally eating, using food for comfort.

45% have a digestive issue. And that could be Crohn's, IBS, diverticulitis, constipation, diarrhea, you name it. The guts are wreck the most common mental symptoms, 78% are overwhelmed, 70% are walking around in a state of disbelief, 62% can't concentrate. So just take that. You can't concentrate. You have a gut issue, you're exhausted. You have to raise your kids, you have to go to work. That's not even the emotional issues. Emotionally. 88% experience, extreme sadness, 83% are very angry. Anybody who's been betrayed, you know, can go back and forth between those two emotions all day long. 79% are stressed. Just a few more. Here's why I wrote, oh yeah, no,


Michelle Henderson :

You're fine.


Dr. Debi Silber:

Yeah. Here's why I wrote trust. Again, 84% have an inability to trust that one just killed me. Yeah, 67% prevent themselves from forming deep relationships because they're afraid of being hurt. Again, 82% find it hard to move forward, 90% want to move forward, but they don't know how.


Michelle Henderson :

And so you just proved it right there with the statistics that people really don't know how to move forward. And I love how you explained that. We start feeling it physically through our symptoms and it brings down our health. So that is one reason why you need to find and seek help for whatever it is. And I know whenever I went to your website, I did see that a lot of people that you have trained and that you work with, they have different specialized program, and it's so great that you allow them to do their specialty because not everybody, you approach the same in their program. And so I find that with your program, I absolutely love that, that you've got a team and you're looking at individuals and seeing what they actually need.


Dr. Debi Silber:

Yeah. Thank you. And first of all, just to wrap it up with post betrayal syndrome, you heard these numbers are super high. They're also not necessarily from a recent betrayal. So think about this, that person who hurt you, that the boyfriend or girlfriend in high school, the parent who did something awful when you were a kid, they may not know care. Remember, they may not even be alive. And here we are walking around with symptoms today because of something left unhealed. The good news is you can heal from all of it, and that's the third discovery. Happy to go through that, but to just respond to your question. Yeah. Within the PBT Institute, I mean, I certify a lot of people and I certify them in the five stages, which I'll share, but they come in with their own decades worth of expertise in their own area.

So this way, we have coaches who specialize in somatic body-based activities to get the trauma out of the tissues, to regulate the nervous system. We have coaches who specialize in narcissism, in divorce, in reconciliation, in self-growth because depending where you are on your betrayal journey, you need very different things. Anyway. So the third discovery, to me that was the most exciting and what was discovered was while we can stay stuck for years, decades, a lifetime, and so many people do, if we're going to fully heal, and by fully heal, I mean symptoms of post betrayal syndrome, like I just shared to that completely rebuilt place where you rebuild your life and yourself called post betrayal transformation, we're going to go through five proven predictable stages. And what's even more exciting about that is we know what happens physically, mentally, and emotionally at each stage, and we know what it takes to move from one stage to the next. Healing is entirely predictable. Happy to go through the stages if you want to hear 'em.


Michelle Henderson :

Absolutely. Let's do it. Let's hear about the five stages.


Dr. Debi Silber:

So they're all knocked out in trust skin. It's what all of our coaches are certified. It's all we do within the PBT Institute. Here's a really broken down version of it. So stage one, and I would invite everybody to just really, you will know exactly what stage you are in and you'll hear it and you'll be like, oh my gosh, that's where I am. Okay. Stage one is before it happens. And if you can imagine four legs of a table, the four legs being physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual. What I saw with everybody, me too, was a heavy lean on the physical and the mental thinking and doing and kind of neglecting or ignoring the emotional and the spiritual feeling and being. So if a table only has two legs, it's easy for that table to topple over. That's us. Stage two, shock trauma D-Day, discovery day.

By far the scariest of all of the stages. Here's where like that person you thought you knew takes a mask off and reveals who they've been, and it's you're shocked and it lands on your body, your mind, your heart, and it's the breakdown of the body, the mind, and the worldview. So right here, you've ignited the stress response. You're now headed for every single stress related symptom, illness, condition, disease. Your mind is in a complete state of chaos. It's like you can't wrap your mind around what you've just learned. It's that weird time warp thing going on, and your worldview has just been shattered. Your worldview is your mental model. The rules that govern you, that prevent chaos, trust this person. These are the rules. This is how life works. And in one earth shattering moment or series of moments, every rule you've been holding to be real and true is no longer the bottom has bottomed out on you and a new bottom hasn't been formed yet.

This is terrifying. But think about it. If the bottom were to bottom out on you, what would you do? You grab hold of anything or any one you could in order to stay safe and stay alive. And that's stage three. Survival instincts emerge. It's the most practical. Out of all of this stages, if you can't help me get out of my way, how do I survive this experience? Where do I go? Who can I trust? How do I feed my kids? Here's the trap though. Stage three by far is the most common place We get stuck. And as I say it, you'll know so many people right in this stage, ready. Here's why. Because it feels so much better than the shock and trauma of where we just came from. We think it's good. We're like, whew. Okay. And because we don't know there's anywhere else to go, we don't know there's a stage four or stage five transformation doesn't even begin until stage four.

But because we don't know there's anywhere else to go, we plant roots here. We're not supposed to, but we don't know that. And four things start to happen. The first thing is you start getting all those small self benefits, that secondary gain, you get to be right. We like being right. We get our story. We get someone to blame. We get sympathy from everyone we tell our story to. We don't have to do the hard work of learning to trust again. Can I trust you? Should I trust you? You know what? Forget it. I'm just not trusting you, right? So we plan deeper now because we're in this place longer than we should be. Now the mind starts doing things like, maybe you're not that great, maybe you deserved it. Maybe this, maybe that. So we plant deeper roots. Again, we're not supposed to be here, but we don't know now because these are the thoughts.

We're thinking, well, this is the energy we start putting out. And energy attracts like energy. So now we start calling situations and circumstances and relationships towards us to confirm, yep, this is where we belong. This is where we'll join that lame support group, and we will actually sabotage our healing because we found our people and we don't want to lose our people. This is where we may start healing. We will sabotage our growth because we don't want to outgrow our betrayer. This is where we may go to couples counseling or therapy and just stay with that because we keep unpacking our story, unpacking, unpacking, unpacking, and we feel heard. There's no strategic plan to move forward, but we feel heard and we think that's all it's going to be. So we think it's good, right? It gets worse. I'll get you out of here because it feels so bad, but we don't know there's anywhere else to go.

Right? Here is where we start numbing, avoiding distracting. So here's where we start using food and drugs, alcohol work, tv, whatever, to numb, void and distract ourselves from this painful place. So think about it, we do it for a day, a week, a month. Now it's a habit. A year, 10 years, 20 years, I can see someone 20 years later and say that emotional eating, you're doing that, drinking that numbing in front of the tv. Do you think that has anything to do with your betrayal? And they would look at me like I'm crazy. And they would say, it happened 20 years ago. All they did was put themselves in stage three and stayed there. Does that make sense?


Michelle Henderson :

Absolutely. Absolutely. And I see that all the time.


Dr. Debi Silber:

And that's actually why I wrote from hard to healed. I'm like, man, you've been through the worst of it already. What the heck are you staying in stage three, four. So from hard to healed to just for stage three anyway. And that's where most people land and stay and justify being there and all of that. And then they have the most symptoms of post betrayal syndrome, and all they do is start medicating and suppressing the symptoms. They're never getting to the root of the problem, which is the betrayal. They're just spending a lifetime medicating, suppressing symptoms, numbing, avoiding, distracting, justifying their story. Anyway, if your willing, willingness is a big word right here to let go of your story and all you get grieve more than the loss, a bunch of things you need to do, you move to stage four. Stage four is finding and adjusting to a new normal.

So here's where you acknowledge I can't undo what happened, but I control what I do with it. Right there in that decision, you're turning down the stress response. You're not healing just yet, but you just stopped the massive damage that was created being created in stages two and stage three, stage four feels like for everybody listening, anybody who's ever moved, if you've ever moved to a new house, office, condo, apartment, all your stuff's not there. It's not quite cozy yet. But you'll be like, yeah, we got this. We can do this. It has that feeling. But think about it. If you were to move, you don't take everything with you. You don't pile up all your junk and pack it up and take it. You get rid of the things that don't represent the version of you that you've outgrown. And what I found was there's one spot going from stage three to stage four. If your friends weren't there for you, you've outgrown them right here, that lame support group, you've outgrown it, that betrayer who's not changing, you've outgrown them. And people ask me all the time, what the heck? I've had these friends for decades. Is it me? Yes, it is. You're undergoing a transformation. And if they don't rise, they don't come. So I see it all the time anyway, when settled into this space, you've made it cozy, you've made it mentally home, you move into the fifth most beautiful stage, and that's healing, rebirth, and a new worldview. The body starts to heal. Self-love eating, well, exercise, stuff like that. You didn't have that head for that earlier. Now you do. The mind is healing. You're making all kinds of new rules, new boundaries based on the road you just traveled and you have a new worldview based on everything you see so clearly now. And the four legs of the table. In the beginning, it was all about the physical and the mental. By this point, we're solidly grounded because we're focused on the emotional and the spiritual too. Those are the five stages.


Michelle Henderson :

And I absolutely love that. When you were talking about stage four, I was really thinking, what it reminds me of is that you're actually giving yourself permission to heal yourself. Does that make sense? To move forward? And I thought, oh my gosh, that's absolutely beautiful. And then of course, you're reborn on the fifth one, so absolutely love that. Let's talk about your books, my dear. Oh my gosh. It's like you are writing all the time, like you said, the Rebuild Roadmap. This is the book that I purchased, and here you have all these professionals showing some strategies that they have in your book. Yeah, the


Dr. Debi Silber:

Roadmap. That's actually for the betrayer. We have a program within the PBT Institute, our rebuild program. We had so many people saying, do you have anything for the betrayer? Of course we have for the betrayed, but we started the rebuild program because I'm not talking about the betrayer, who's just onto the next, have no remorse regret. No, but the betrayer who says, what in the world did I do? I just blew up the heart and the trust of the very person that I love the most. So our rebuild program is for that person, and they do beautifully. And the rebuild roadmap is something that we work with internally with our betrayers, and it's really powerful. Oh


Michelle Henderson :

My gosh. And I love that because you're healing from both point of views or both of their roles, I guess you could say, in the situation of betrayal. I love that. Tell us a little bit about from hardened to Healed.


Dr. Debi Silber:

So from hard to heal. That's the one I wrote Trust again. And that was when all the discoveries happened. I mean, it was like, how do I keep that to myself? So the five stages are all mapped out in trust again. But then when I found everyone was getting stuck in stage three, I wrote from Horn to Healed. It's just for stage three, but it's also, it doesn't have to be, you could be stuck in stage three, not necessarily from a betrayal. It could be from beliefs that don't serve from something that wasn't trauma related. For example, let's just say you were a little kid, and I use this example a lot. You're a 10-year-old boy and he has some earth shattering news to share with mom and mom's in the kitchen on the phone, and he runs into the kitchen and she says she shushes him right there.

At that moment, he could have made that mean I'm not important, I don't matter. And then what happens is our mind will believe anything we tell it. So then the mind looks for confirming evidence to support that belief. And then eventually the mind's like, oh, I didn't realize you want me to have this playing all day long. No worries. Go about your business, and I'll just have this play along as a program. So think about it, if you have a belief, I don't matter, I'm not important, what choices would you make as you're moving through life? Who would you date? Who would you be friends with? What job opportunities would you do? Would you not do from something as small as the mom shushing him? It could be from something like that. So yeah, from Horn to Heal is really all about that whole stage three life,


Michelle Henderson :

And I love it. We're just going to keep going. Trust again. So tell us about that book.


Dr. Debi Silber:

Yeah, that was really, that to me felt like the most important book I've ever written, because that was the study, the Discoveries, the Five Stages. My story, of course, is in there too. And it was like when the five stages showed up, I just said, how in the world do I keep this to myself? I mean, here's a roadmap to heal from this. I have to get this out there. And I put it in a program. And then that blew up. And then everyone wanted to work with me, and I was like, let me create my certification program so I could get the five stages out to people. And that went crazy. And I was like, wait a second. I know what works. I know what doesn't work. What would happen if I put everything that works under one roof, discarding everything that doesn't work? And that's the PBT Institute. But I wrote Trust again, because I said, people are, there's so much shame, they're so embarrassed, and they struggle and suffer in silence. So trust again, was really for that person who thinks they're crazy, thinks they're alone, and so they realize, no, they're not. And away from all of it. Yeah,


Michelle Henderson :

Absolutely. And you've got the Unshakable Woman. I love that title. And also with the workbook, I guess this talks about the Four Steps.


Dr. Debi Silber:

That was a little bit different. Actually, I wrote The Unshakable Woman before I was really ready to talk about my betrayal. So it's like I did two TEDx talks, and the first one stopped sabotaging Yourself. That was, I don't even know how I did it. That was six weeks after my betrayal, and you kind of hear me hinting at it, but I wasn't ready to talk about it. I was ready to talk about transformation, but I just wasn't really ready to share my story. I remember hearing from, I think it was Carolyn Mac, you share from the scar, not from the wound. And there was too much of a wound. I wasn't at that scar place yet. So the Unshakable Woman sort of is an overall trauma, not necessarily, and specifically about betrayal.


Michelle Henderson :

And I love that because, oh, I'm sorry. I was going to say, it seems like each book, you're healing yourself as well in helping other people. I'm sorry, go ahead.


Dr. Debi Silber:

No, no. And I said it, and then I created the workbook because there were so many activities, experiential activities I was doing with clients. And I thought, okay, well you know what? These activities are so helpful just to help us heal from whatever it is that isn't working well for us in our lives.


Michelle Henderson :

Right. Okay. So lifestyle fitness program


Michelle Henderson :

Should Have gotten this one.


Dr. Debi Silber:

The first book I've ever written, and this was when I was in health forever, and I thought, if you eat well and exercise, that's all you need. And I was so sick, and I had a list of symptoms, illnesses, conditions, even disease, and I realized I had surgery. And while I healed, I studied to become a whole health coach, health expert, trained to teach how your lifestyle creates health or wellness or illness and disease. And I learned that, oh my gosh, my toxic lifestyle from these dysfunctional relationships and this mental verbal emotional abuse that I grew up with was really contributing to all of it. And so with that, I remember going through that program and cutting the ties to those relationships, and I healed from everything. And I remember the founder of the program, who was my mentor at the time, said, oh my gosh, Debbie, when you did that, you traded an anchor for a pair of wings. I healed from everything. And I was like, this is too good to keep to myself. So I wrote the lifestyle fitness program that just flew out of me.


Michelle Henderson :

Oh, that's awesome. Okay. How about a pocket full of mojo? I love this.


Dr. Debi Silber:

Actually, a pocket full of Mojo was just back in the day, the lifestyle fitness program was pretty much for moms. And so many men said, well, what about us? So I just came up with this 365 tips to help you get through your day. And actually, I remember a lot of companies bought it as almost like a corporate wellness tool. They would just pick a tip and they would talk about it in the office. And a lot of people really enjoyed that book.


Michelle Henderson :

I absolutely, it's like, how does she have time for all of this? But again, it's all through the healing. So let's kind of summarize. If you had to inspire somebody and what would you tell them?


Dr. Debi Silber:

I love that question. I would say, I didn't do anything anyone else couldn't do. I mean, now there's a roadmap for it. Staying stuck has become a choice and not a good one. And not one in your favor. What's waiting for you in stage five? New relationships, new businesses like the PBT Institute, that was a stage five thing. A new strong version of you, a new relationship either with the person who hurt you at a very different level or with someone new, don't stay stuck. And just to close the loop on my story, rebuilding is always a choice. Whether you rebuild yourself, like I said, and move on, that's what I did with my family, wasn't an option to rebuild with them. Or if the situation lends itself, you're willing, you want rebuild something from the ground up new. And that's what I did with my husband. So not long ago as two totally transform people. We married each other again, new rings, new vows, new dress, and our four kids is our bridal party. Betrayal will show you who someone truly is and then move along. It also has the opportunity to wake them up to who they temporarily became. You could still move along, but you also have an opportunity for a very different type of relationship when that's the case. Right.


Michelle Henderson :

Oh, so thank you so much for sharing that. Are you ready for your last question?


Dr. Debi Silber:

I am.


Michelle Henderson :

All right, let's bring it on. All right. And we'll be able to see it whenever it stops, because it's really tiny on the screen.


Dr. Debi Silber:

Yes. I can't see anything, but I'll listen.


Michelle Henderson :

Okay. So what is your secret talent?


Dr. Debi Silber:

My secret talent.


Michelle Henderson :

Secret talent. Everybody has one.


Dr. Debi Silber:

Yeah. What I've always heard is that I'm inspiring and I can inspire others. Just I guess because of my own story and what I've been through, and if that helps others, I'm grateful and blessed.


Michelle Henderson :

Yeah. And do you feel like we go through certain situations so that we can help heal others?


Dr. Debi Silber:

I feel like either my choice was be the poster child for betrayal, which wasn't a good option, or do something really good with something really painful. And as I was going through the study, I remember thinking there was this very profound moment where I say, I have no idea how I'm going to heal from this, but if I do, I'm taking everybody with me.


Michelle Henderson :

There you go. Alright, so where can everybody find you? What's your favorite place?


Dr. Debi Silber:

Everything is at the PBT as in post betrayal transformation, the pbt institute.com.


Michelle Henderson :

And of course, I'll put that in the little notes in the little comment section as well. And all right, I'm going to leave with one. You're going to say goodbye to everybody by saying one word. An inspiration word,


Dr. Debi Silber:

An inspiration word, transformation.


Michelle Henderson :

Oh, I love it. Transformation. You have heard it here, everybody. So what we want you to do is really think about what transformation means to you. And if you have been betrayed, really give yourself that healing and embrace where you are and find that trust and move forward. Give that permission to move forward so that you can transform. All right guys. I'll see you next week.

 

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